Tonight I am sure that Marcie and Drew's house is cleaner than ours.
While trying to prepare dinner for another family, the girls decided they wanted to play outside.
They were cleaning up something and wanted to give the dogs a bath.
Only the dogs did not want a bath!
In the meantime, the police helicopters and news helicopters were circling around and very loud. (There had been a car chase for a stolen car which ended a few miles away. It just added to the confusion at our house!)
So on our deck are Grace and Annabel and the dogs, a water hose going, shampoo, helicopters circling, Grandmother trying to help, and I am in the kitchen trying to cook.
All of a sudden in comes Ollie, followed by Nina, followed by Annabel, followed by Grace, and a trail of shampoo and wet dog circling the entire house, barking, shouting, dogs running, and girls yelling!
Finally the dogs were captured and returned outside to complete their baths.
Only the water hose somehow sprayed Annabel until she was dripping wet. I am sure it was an accident, don't you? Grace got wet enough that they both had to get right into the shower, so now I have a pile of wet clothes and dog towels!
I cannot imagine why our house does not seem as clean as Marcie and Drew's.
PLUS I must surely be the messiest cook in the world! While they worked their magic on the rest of the house, the kitchen looks like I must have fed an army a 5 course meal!
The dogs do smell better though and dinner was a success.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Happy Mother's Day!
In China, there are two women who gave birth to two little baby girls just over 11 years ago.
Because of their circumstances they were unable to keep their daughters.
BUT because of their love they placed their daughters where they could be found.
And because of this, I am a mom. I hope I can provide the love and care these mothers wished for their children when they made this heart wrenching decision, to help them develop into the people their birth mothers hoped and dreamed for them.
Last weekend when we were in ER with Mom, I simply could not allow myself to even conceive of the idea of something happening to Mom. My mom has been with me through some very difficult times. She spent a LOT of nights perched on a radiator/air conditioning unit when I was having brain surgery. Most recently she spent two nights in uncomfortable chairs in our hospital after my surgery. But with her there, I knew I was taken care of and could rest.
She is also the best grandmother in the world and I am glad to be a mom so she can be a grandmom AGAIN! Not that she has a lack of great grandchildren, but living next door provides plenty of opportunity to spoil her closest two!
And they love her and tend to her making sure she is taken care of! Annabel has started grabbing her by the arm and walking her to and from the car. And when Annabel has a hold of you, you know it! Tonight Mom cooked dinner and I left Annabel to help clean up the dishes, while I cleaned up a project we had started, and Grace did homework. Annabel banned Mom from her kitchen and jumped in unloading and reloading the dishwasher.
Marcie, my niece, and her husband Drew, had everyone to lunch at their house. What a fantastic treat! The food was delicious and we enjoyed all being together. Mark and Martha surprised me with a Starbucks gift card. MY FAVORITE!!!
My only gift I wanted was a nap this afternoon. Although I had one, there was more than one time I was woken up by the very loud whisper of "MOM" followed by something terribly important. Then the dogs came through several times barking, and then I decided to give up!
Saturday was supposed to be our biggest event of the year. Last week at this time all the news was still around the swine flu, so I chose to postpone it. So it was very strange to be off on a day that is usually so busy that I want to sleep through Mother's Day.
The girls were registered for another class at Lowes and made cute planters for Mother's Day. Since Dad was with us, we made REALLY QUICK trips to the dollar store and Ross, but spent plenty at all locations!
Mom wanted and needed a new sweater. I had almost bought one last weekend but at Ross found I could get 3 for the same price as one! Sounds like a commercial. Since I was in a hurry and found lots of good choices, all on sale, I just bought them all! Now hopefully she won't be cold.
We managed to fit in a trip to Sam's and then dinner at El Fenix, before I finished the day off with mowing our yard. It was a great day with lots accomplished.
The previous week was difficult, waiting to hear the test results for Mom and in the meantime I began throwing up after every meal, which gets old in a hurry. I now know what an upper GI is (Yuck), with the result being the need for the other part of the surgery needed much sooner than expected.
Thank goodness there are only 3 weeks and 3 days left of school. I am anxious to see what the plans are for Annabel to learn everything before the end of school.
Today Grace asked what I used to do on the weekends before I became a mom. I simply cannot remember, but guessing it was not nearly this much fun! She also commented that Marcie and Drew's house was a lot cleaner than ours. Surely not! She said there just wasn't as much stuff in their house. I explained that with kids it does add to your house. She wanted to know if I was disappointed that ours looked like it did. I told her I would not change it for anything!
Because of their circumstances they were unable to keep their daughters.
BUT because of their love they placed their daughters where they could be found.
And because of this, I am a mom. I hope I can provide the love and care these mothers wished for their children when they made this heart wrenching decision, to help them develop into the people their birth mothers hoped and dreamed for them.
Last weekend when we were in ER with Mom, I simply could not allow myself to even conceive of the idea of something happening to Mom. My mom has been with me through some very difficult times. She spent a LOT of nights perched on a radiator/air conditioning unit when I was having brain surgery. Most recently she spent two nights in uncomfortable chairs in our hospital after my surgery. But with her there, I knew I was taken care of and could rest.
She is also the best grandmother in the world and I am glad to be a mom so she can be a grandmom AGAIN! Not that she has a lack of great grandchildren, but living next door provides plenty of opportunity to spoil her closest two!
And they love her and tend to her making sure she is taken care of! Annabel has started grabbing her by the arm and walking her to and from the car. And when Annabel has a hold of you, you know it! Tonight Mom cooked dinner and I left Annabel to help clean up the dishes, while I cleaned up a project we had started, and Grace did homework. Annabel banned Mom from her kitchen and jumped in unloading and reloading the dishwasher.
Marcie, my niece, and her husband Drew, had everyone to lunch at their house. What a fantastic treat! The food was delicious and we enjoyed all being together. Mark and Martha surprised me with a Starbucks gift card. MY FAVORITE!!!
My only gift I wanted was a nap this afternoon. Although I had one, there was more than one time I was woken up by the very loud whisper of "MOM" followed by something terribly important. Then the dogs came through several times barking, and then I decided to give up!
Saturday was supposed to be our biggest event of the year. Last week at this time all the news was still around the swine flu, so I chose to postpone it. So it was very strange to be off on a day that is usually so busy that I want to sleep through Mother's Day.
The girls were registered for another class at Lowes and made cute planters for Mother's Day. Since Dad was with us, we made REALLY QUICK trips to the dollar store and Ross, but spent plenty at all locations!
Mom wanted and needed a new sweater. I had almost bought one last weekend but at Ross found I could get 3 for the same price as one! Sounds like a commercial. Since I was in a hurry and found lots of good choices, all on sale, I just bought them all! Now hopefully she won't be cold.
We managed to fit in a trip to Sam's and then dinner at El Fenix, before I finished the day off with mowing our yard. It was a great day with lots accomplished.
The previous week was difficult, waiting to hear the test results for Mom and in the meantime I began throwing up after every meal, which gets old in a hurry. I now know what an upper GI is (Yuck), with the result being the need for the other part of the surgery needed much sooner than expected.
Thank goodness there are only 3 weeks and 3 days left of school. I am anxious to see what the plans are for Annabel to learn everything before the end of school.
Today Grace asked what I used to do on the weekends before I became a mom. I simply cannot remember, but guessing it was not nearly this much fun! She also commented that Marcie and Drew's house was a lot cleaner than ours. Surely not! She said there just wasn't as much stuff in their house. I explained that with kids it does add to your house. She wanted to know if I was disappointed that ours looked like it did. I told her I would not change it for anything!
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
I need a cell phone!
When Annabel was asked if anyone had talked to her at school yesterday, she told Dad, no, she didn't have a cell phone!
OK, that was not the talk I was expecting!
Yesterday I met with the principal and assistant principal to discuss what could be done to help Annabel through the rest of the school year.
While there have been attempts to help her with her adjustment to the English language, there has also been the continued bullying. It is amazing how many people I have heard from that were bullied. The only person I remember trying to bully me was stopped very quickly when my cousin threatened to beat her up. Yes, he was willing to beat up a girl for me! It was great to have a defender!
What I have worked and worked with is trying to assure Annabel that she has a defender in me and the rest of her family. Slowly I see her crossing that big divide and learning to rely on me as mom.
So none of the changes promised by the school took place yesterday, I have high hopes that some will occur today.
I need her out of the environment where she feels threatened so she can learn and some counseling to help her understand she is able to trust adults to help, not just punish her.
This week has been great because my niece Katie came to help out because of her concern for Mom. Katie is the one who came and cleaned, organized, and decorated our house while we were in China. I was glad we had it in good shape when she came so she would know how very much I appreciated all her hard work.
With Katie here, Mom has been able to take things a little slower. Thankfully she had Katie because I have been so distracted with the school and work, that I have not been much help, other than serving char burned burgers Sunday!
Last Friday the hospital threw a party to celebrate my 10 years of employment. It is VERY significant to me, as I have never worked that long in the same job title. One of the best parts of my job is planning programs to help educate the public. Being a breast cancer survivor myself, it seemed like a great idea to do something annually to remind women of the need for early detection and treatment. So the Pink Ribbon Tea party was started. It is always the Saturday before Mother's Day. This year it did not seem prudent (a good George Bush term) to continue with the plans with the threat of the swine flu. It has almost been as much work to postpone the event as it is to plan it. As soon as I announced we would delay the tea party, the CDC announced we should return to "normal". Life, funny, isn't it?
This morning as I am trying to pick up a little before rushing out the door, it dawned on me just how great a support group we have around us. The kindness and love shown me celebrating my employment to the care and concern about mom to the candid remarks and sharing from others who have been through similar situations as Annabel, humble me. Whether you are near or far, your thoughts are greatly appreciated.
OK, that was not the talk I was expecting!
Yesterday I met with the principal and assistant principal to discuss what could be done to help Annabel through the rest of the school year.
While there have been attempts to help her with her adjustment to the English language, there has also been the continued bullying. It is amazing how many people I have heard from that were bullied. The only person I remember trying to bully me was stopped very quickly when my cousin threatened to beat her up. Yes, he was willing to beat up a girl for me! It was great to have a defender!
What I have worked and worked with is trying to assure Annabel that she has a defender in me and the rest of her family. Slowly I see her crossing that big divide and learning to rely on me as mom.
So none of the changes promised by the school took place yesterday, I have high hopes that some will occur today.
I need her out of the environment where she feels threatened so she can learn and some counseling to help her understand she is able to trust adults to help, not just punish her.
This week has been great because my niece Katie came to help out because of her concern for Mom. Katie is the one who came and cleaned, organized, and decorated our house while we were in China. I was glad we had it in good shape when she came so she would know how very much I appreciated all her hard work.
With Katie here, Mom has been able to take things a little slower. Thankfully she had Katie because I have been so distracted with the school and work, that I have not been much help, other than serving char burned burgers Sunday!
Last Friday the hospital threw a party to celebrate my 10 years of employment. It is VERY significant to me, as I have never worked that long in the same job title. One of the best parts of my job is planning programs to help educate the public. Being a breast cancer survivor myself, it seemed like a great idea to do something annually to remind women of the need for early detection and treatment. So the Pink Ribbon Tea party was started. It is always the Saturday before Mother's Day. This year it did not seem prudent (a good George Bush term) to continue with the plans with the threat of the swine flu. It has almost been as much work to postpone the event as it is to plan it. As soon as I announced we would delay the tea party, the CDC announced we should return to "normal". Life, funny, isn't it?
This morning as I am trying to pick up a little before rushing out the door, it dawned on me just how great a support group we have around us. The kindness and love shown me celebrating my employment to the care and concern about mom to the candid remarks and sharing from others who have been through similar situations as Annabel, humble me. Whether you are near or far, your thoughts are greatly appreciated.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Next door is good
Tonight as we came back into the front door, Annabel stopped as if a light had gone off in her head and said, "it is good that we are so close so if Grandmom and Poppa need us!". AMEN, Annabel!
Last night we had a first hand experience of why it is so fortunate that we are so close.
But I will get to that in a minute.
Annabel had announced Friday night that she was tired and planned to sleep until 10:00 Saturday morning. She reminded me that she was still tired from our road last weekend and that it had been a hard week.
Of course she was up early!
We headed out to pick up our fruit and veg coop shipment, buy gas, and came right back home.
All I really wanted to do for the day was sit and read. I'm struggling with deciding whether to postpone our big event next Saturday, and hoped I could find my answer. Some time on the deck with a great Alexander McCall Smith book, seemed to be the best idea!
Annabel has a LOT of trouble filling "down" time, so she came out to keep me company. No time to think!
The back yard was way too high and knew it needed to be mowed before the rain hit, so it was time to get busy.
Everyone pitched in reworking a flower bed and moving stepping stones, my park bench, and just general cleaning up. The whole time we were working Dad kept saying that it was tornado weather. The humidity was so high, it was overcast, and very still.
We finally found a stopping p0int and got in right before the storm hit.
Dad was pretty close on the money when you see what happened to the Cowboys' practice field. The lightening and thunder were scary. It looked like it was striking right in the front yard.
When there was a break, we had dinner, girls had showers, and we watched the new Jonas Brothers show.
It was time for my shower and Grace came running in saying that Poppa had called and there was something wrong with Grandmommy.
So with shampoo still in my hair, I tried to get out as quickly as possible, dressed, and over to see what was wrong.
Mom had been talking to my aunt and suddenly could not make the words come out. She told her that she had to hang up and then told Dad what had happened.
So I quickly try to remember what are the symptoms of a stroke and after Dad had checked her blood pressure, Annabel gave her an 81 mg. aspirin, I asked if she could tell us the name of the president.
You could see that she was stumped by the question.
I asked if she could remember the one before the current president.
Again, she could not.
I asked if she could tell me the names of the girls sitting on the couch.
She could not.
OK, that was all the evidence I needed to rule we had to get to the hospital.
The three of us ran home and changed from pajamas, got shoes, and locked up the house. The whole time I am trying to decide what were my options for the girls but decided we didn't have time to work it out at that point.
Thank goodness the hospital is SO close and they triaged her immediately with an EKG performed within a few minutes of arriving.
Knowing the ER waiting room is not the best place to leave kids, since everyone coming in is sick or hurt, the staff moved the girls into a family room.
I felt the ultimate in being part of the "sandwich" generation, as I made my way from the examination room to the family room, and back and forth all night.
After all the tests, a million texts to Lisa, the doctor announced she had a TIA, or a mini stroke, and she had the choice of going home or checking in.
Gradually she had remembered Annabel's name, and then Obama's name, and finally Grace's name, so she was ready to go home.
Today we had a VERY quiet day ending with me burning burgers for everyone on the grill.
I got my shower tonight, but sleeping with the phone close.
Last night we had a first hand experience of why it is so fortunate that we are so close.
But I will get to that in a minute.
Annabel had announced Friday night that she was tired and planned to sleep until 10:00 Saturday morning. She reminded me that she was still tired from our road last weekend and that it had been a hard week.
Of course she was up early!
We headed out to pick up our fruit and veg coop shipment, buy gas, and came right back home.
All I really wanted to do for the day was sit and read. I'm struggling with deciding whether to postpone our big event next Saturday, and hoped I could find my answer. Some time on the deck with a great Alexander McCall Smith book, seemed to be the best idea!
Annabel has a LOT of trouble filling "down" time, so she came out to keep me company. No time to think!
The back yard was way too high and knew it needed to be mowed before the rain hit, so it was time to get busy.
Everyone pitched in reworking a flower bed and moving stepping stones, my park bench, and just general cleaning up. The whole time we were working Dad kept saying that it was tornado weather. The humidity was so high, it was overcast, and very still.
We finally found a stopping p0int and got in right before the storm hit.
Dad was pretty close on the money when you see what happened to the Cowboys' practice field. The lightening and thunder were scary. It looked like it was striking right in the front yard.
When there was a break, we had dinner, girls had showers, and we watched the new Jonas Brothers show.
It was time for my shower and Grace came running in saying that Poppa had called and there was something wrong with Grandmommy.
So with shampoo still in my hair, I tried to get out as quickly as possible, dressed, and over to see what was wrong.
Mom had been talking to my aunt and suddenly could not make the words come out. She told her that she had to hang up and then told Dad what had happened.
So I quickly try to remember what are the symptoms of a stroke and after Dad had checked her blood pressure, Annabel gave her an 81 mg. aspirin, I asked if she could tell us the name of the president.
You could see that she was stumped by the question.
I asked if she could remember the one before the current president.
Again, she could not.
I asked if she could tell me the names of the girls sitting on the couch.
She could not.
OK, that was all the evidence I needed to rule we had to get to the hospital.
The three of us ran home and changed from pajamas, got shoes, and locked up the house. The whole time I am trying to decide what were my options for the girls but decided we didn't have time to work it out at that point.
Thank goodness the hospital is SO close and they triaged her immediately with an EKG performed within a few minutes of arriving.
Knowing the ER waiting room is not the best place to leave kids, since everyone coming in is sick or hurt, the staff moved the girls into a family room.
I felt the ultimate in being part of the "sandwich" generation, as I made my way from the examination room to the family room, and back and forth all night.
After all the tests, a million texts to Lisa, the doctor announced she had a TIA, or a mini stroke, and she had the choice of going home or checking in.
Gradually she had remembered Annabel's name, and then Obama's name, and finally Grace's name, so she was ready to go home.
Today we had a VERY quiet day ending with me burning burgers for everyone on the grill.
I got my shower tonight, but sleeping with the phone close.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Drastic measures
Yesterday I took a drastic step and filed a complaint with the Office of Civil Rights regarding the treatment of Annabel at school.
Once I went back through my notes of all the things that had transpired and the treatment she had endured I just wanted to cry. It has consistently been an issue. She has been harassed and discriminated against because she is Chinese, I believe.
If Spanish had been her primary language there was plenty of help, but nobody could bother since she spoke Chinese.
Over and over the students have been allowed to pick on her, kick her, spit on her.
In discussing it with a counselor I realized that the "orphanage" mentality is still prevalent because she has also endured additional punishment from the teachers whenever she reported the harassment.
She cried to Grace the other night that she did not want to be labeled a "Mommy's girl" so the kids would not pick on her. Grace was trying to convince her to tell me more of what was going on.
That is another thing that bothers me. I only know about the events she has reported to me. There have surely been so many more.
I tried to go higher through the school district to resolve the issue but was told that I had to fill out a form to request help and the only place that form was available was at the school. When I went to the school they did not know where it was or what I was talking about.
I tried to reach our school board member with absolutely NO response.
This week there were two situations, one by the students, the other by the principal. This is after meeting and assurances that it would NEVER happen again, if it REALLY did happen because they were convinced it was just that she misunderstood.
In going back through my notes I found where the teacher whose class most of the instances have happened in told me on October 30 that due to the language barrier that he could not help her and she just did not understand. Then on November 2 he told me that he had a talk with her and explained that the kids weren't being mean, she misunderstood.
That is phenomenal isn't it? If you have tried to learn Chinese, like I have, after several months of class I gave up. He learned it in 2 days!!!
The counselor also told me she was concerned about lifelong repercussions of the bullying. I can't let this go on.
I had left a message and emailed to the school after what happened Tuesday. I finally got a call back Thursday afternoon asking if I wanted a meeting with the teachers again.
I started to agree then decided that was a waste of time. I have done that over and over. I will meet with the principal and the assistant principal, but also ready to see if the media is interested in treatment of a student whose primary language is not Spanish.
I am thankful we have today to basically do nothing. I always hope that time spent together, especially when Mom and Dad are involved, that we can rejuvenate and recharge her and let her know that she has a family who is here to love and support her.
Once I went back through my notes of all the things that had transpired and the treatment she had endured I just wanted to cry. It has consistently been an issue. She has been harassed and discriminated against because she is Chinese, I believe.
If Spanish had been her primary language there was plenty of help, but nobody could bother since she spoke Chinese.
Over and over the students have been allowed to pick on her, kick her, spit on her.
In discussing it with a counselor I realized that the "orphanage" mentality is still prevalent because she has also endured additional punishment from the teachers whenever she reported the harassment.
She cried to Grace the other night that she did not want to be labeled a "Mommy's girl" so the kids would not pick on her. Grace was trying to convince her to tell me more of what was going on.
That is another thing that bothers me. I only know about the events she has reported to me. There have surely been so many more.
I tried to go higher through the school district to resolve the issue but was told that I had to fill out a form to request help and the only place that form was available was at the school. When I went to the school they did not know where it was or what I was talking about.
I tried to reach our school board member with absolutely NO response.
This week there were two situations, one by the students, the other by the principal. This is after meeting and assurances that it would NEVER happen again, if it REALLY did happen because they were convinced it was just that she misunderstood.
In going back through my notes I found where the teacher whose class most of the instances have happened in told me on October 30 that due to the language barrier that he could not help her and she just did not understand. Then on November 2 he told me that he had a talk with her and explained that the kids weren't being mean, she misunderstood.
That is phenomenal isn't it? If you have tried to learn Chinese, like I have, after several months of class I gave up. He learned it in 2 days!!!
The counselor also told me she was concerned about lifelong repercussions of the bullying. I can't let this go on.
I had left a message and emailed to the school after what happened Tuesday. I finally got a call back Thursday afternoon asking if I wanted a meeting with the teachers again.
I started to agree then decided that was a waste of time. I have done that over and over. I will meet with the principal and the assistant principal, but also ready to see if the media is interested in treatment of a student whose primary language is not Spanish.
I am thankful we have today to basically do nothing. I always hope that time spent together, especially when Mom and Dad are involved, that we can rejuvenate and recharge her and let her know that she has a family who is here to love and support her.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Out of gas?
Tonight after Annabel had eaten 2 1/2 ears of corn and after she had already eaten 3 bananas, she announced that a boy in her class had run out of gas today.
Run out of gas?
Yes, he had been tooting a lot during class and he finally ran out of gas!
Run out of gas?
Yes, he had been tooting a lot during class and he finally ran out of gas!
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