Grocery Stores and early days of being a Mom!

I tell everyone I was a late bloomer in starting a family. I was actually 48 when I adopted Grace. For so many of you that is older than your mother! And here I am with a 6 year old. She asked me the other day if I had been her birth mother would she be older. Good question, but I don't think so!
Before I left for China all I could do was fret about going to the grocery store with Grace when we returned. Someone had written to me that all the sound and lights would/could be upsetting. I didn't know if I should put her in the cart and how I would keep up with her in the store. The other thing I was concerned about was what type of shampoo to get her.

Those were my only concerns! (My mom bought her some shampoo, so I could cross that off my list. Grocery stores? She just walked beside me, no running wild or getting lost.)

Almost immediately reality set in. Thank goodness Jana was there to provide and cover for me on the things I didn't even think of! Maybe if you start with a baby you grow with them, but starting with a 6 year old you feel like you are in the final exams and missed all of the classes!

The very first night together, our guide, James, stayed to ensure I knew how to give a child a bath, even checking the temperature of the water before he let her get in.

I will never forget what happened when she got into that huge tub. She squatted. Took the wash cloth, wet it, wet her hair, washed and rinsed it, soaped herself down, never moving from the tiny spot she started in. Then wrung out the wash cloth until it was practically dry. She had never seen a bathtub and didn't know what to do in it. They had a small circular structure that was possibly outside from her description. This was for baths.

I just stared in amazement.

She didn't need any help.

So I gave her her toothbrush and toothpaste. She began a process with water in a cup, rinsed her toothbrush in it, swirling it around, took the same water, swished through her mouth, spit it out and was done. It looked like a system a much older person would have devised. But she didn't waste a drop of water.

I wonder if this trip will bring back some of her initial memories of staying at a 5 star hotel compared to the home of her foster family or the orphanage. It had to feel something like Little Orphan Annie arriving at Daddy Warbucks for the first time. But she never let on. The only thing she wanted was the remote to the TV.

Since she was 6, I thought she should take a nap. That lasted only one day. The second day was a fight and after that I gave up! I would nap and she would watch her Chinese "stories" or "soap operas". I really don't know what they were, but it involved warriors, princesses, and a storyline that seemed to continue each day.

One day I was napping and she was catching up on her soaps, while drawing. I woke up just as she took her scissors and cut a big chunk of hair that kept falling in her eyes. So we found the hotel beauty shop and got a haircut.

When we would go out in Nanchang, she would grab Gillian's hand and lead the way. I don't think she had actually been to the places we were going, but she took charge anyway. She had little interest in clothes shopping, but realize now she didn't think she would get to keep them. She only wanted a pair of tennis shoes. No wonder! The pair she was sent to me in was at least 3 sizes too big for her.

While in Nanchang we visited the Pagoda that everyone sees (can't even remember the name). Jana knew more about it than our guide. Most of our free time we spent in parks. Each park was named after a specific date or other historical event. And each had an assortment of rides. I didn't see anything that looked like safety inspections, but still let them ride a few. Grace remembers her foster sister letting her ride them. There would also be stalls set up and people had crafts you could pay to do. One was sand painting and we all had a good time with it. Other displays in the park were of military equipment, right next to the carousel. Some of the rides were like giant wind up toys and you would drive them on the sidewalk.

But everywhere we went in those parks, people would ask our guide if we were movie stars. What a hoot! Most wanted to have pictures made with us, especially Jana of course. She was tall and had beautiful red hair and enjoyed every minute we were there.

Back to the theory of the noise and lights of a grocery story scaring her. NO WAY! Nanchang is a large city with fast moving, noisy traffic. You walk out of the hotel and get caught up in the street traffic, cars, buses, taxis, bikes, motorcycles, and you are on foot! This child showed no fear of anything.

We loved going to Wal Mart in Nanchang. It is several stories, but has a huge array of items like in the states. They also had KFC, which was very convenient. Since I wasn't sure what I was ordering, they would have a laminated mat showing you the choices. Someone spoke enough English to convince me the bucket was the pretty price. So here are 5 people, my sister, with bright red hair, her blonde daughter, her Chinese daughter, my Chinese daughter, and me sitting in the KFC in Wal Mart in Nanchang with a bucket of chicken and a one liter pepsi!

I will be forever grateful that Gillian and Darcey got to go with us. I don't think Grace knew how to play. She knew how to work the remote, but had never had an endless supply of paper, scissors, glue, pencils, paints, and all the other things to be creative. The girls took her under their wing and showed her so much, without even speaking the same language.

I know I will come back to lots of memories of our first trip, but the night before we left Nanchang to go to Guangzhou, we had a "traditional" Chinese meal. Jana ordered the fish and they promptly brought out a plastic shopping bag, had her look in it, then bowed and left. It had the live fish they were going to prepare for her and needed her approval! She ate the whole thing, except the head, which was on the plate.

Eventually I will have to address losing Jana, but right now I am enjoying the great memories of this trip together.